Issue 87: Finding Meaning
THE LEAP
BY QUANTUM ORANGE
GROW, EXPAND & EVOLVE
ISSUE 87 | FINDING MEANING
Each week The (Quantum) Leap summarises a key aspect of success into what you need to Think, Feel and Do to create a personal shift.
The heart of human excellence often begins to beat when you discover a pursuit that absorbs you, frees you, challenges you, or gives you a sense of meaning, joy or passion.
~ Terry Orlick
THINK
“We look for meaning to be revealed to us instead of finding meaning in what we are doing - right now. We need to make this idea become the basis of our spiritual work - to intimately touch our source via the truth of our existence as a part of the world. We must find a way to thread our inner selves and our current reality together so that we become whole instead of separate.” Paul Blackburn
Research suggests that purpose not only buoys us when life throws challenges our way, but that people who are purposeful live longer and are more satisfied with their lives. Finding meaning, therefore, has a measurable impact on both the quality and length of our lives.
For most people, the idea of finding meaning is daunting. But in truth cultivating meaning is often as simple as going looking for what is already there, by slowing down long enough to unearth our connections to the people and places around us.
How do we practically implement such a big concept?
First, it is important to understand that if we want to find meaning, we will have to create the space for it. Rushing through the day, barely acknowledging the opportunities to thread our inner selves into the larger fabric of our lives is a sure way to miss any meaning we might have found.
Meaning is different for us all - what holds meaning for me, may hold none for you. Therefore in order to find it, you’ll have to search for what feels important to you. Look for the things that you can lose yourself in, which hold absolute joy in the moment and during which your heart is fulfilled. They’re a great place to start.
Next, you’ll need to make sure you’re being present in the moment. We consistently bowl through life so fast that we dissociate from the spiritual. We separate everything that needs to be done out into little pieces - the gym for our bodies, counselling for relationships, reading for our minds - but spend little time reconciling any of those things with our deepest, most connected self. Without that connection, it is impossible to find meaning, and that connection is unlikely to occur if we are not present.
Therefore, if step one in finding meaning is to make space for it, then step two is to bring ourselves mindfully into the moment. Those things in combination give us the perspective we desperately need and set in motion a chain reaction that often leads to discovering meaning.
That is not to say meaning is going to walk up and smack us on the head if we just sit around doing nothing - that will not happen. But if we take action to create space and connect with ourselves in the present moment as a part of whatever activity we are undertaking, meaning more often than not unfolds.
Next, it is critically important to understand that we create meaning. It is not universal.
Ask any bricklayer why they do it and they’ll tell you they put up with the intense physical labour in exchange for the money. Yet Winston Churchill was a fanatical bricklayer simply because he enjoyed the mindfulness of that activity. Two drastically different experiences of the same activity because of the meaning assigned by the individuals involved.
So it is also helpful to ask yourself…
- What meaning am I assigning?
- Why that in particular?
- How often do I actually ask myself, ‘What is the meaning of this?’
- Have I assigned the meaning that is right for me, or did I just pick up what was given to me and run with it?
We rush around looking for things that will inform us about ourselves, saying things like, “I can’t find my passion”.
It’s crucial we stop, take a deep breath and bring ourselves into the moment long enough to realise that whatever we decide to give meaning to, will suddenly have it.
FEEL
It’s not surprising to learn research shows feeling we have made a positive impact on others is commonly associated with both an increased sense of significance and the belief that our lives are meaningful.
The sense that we matter, both to ourselves and others, can easily be boosted by doing all of the things we’d associate with being the best version of ourselves.
In terms of significance, we can seek out experiences that are intrinsically rewarding, like losing ourselves in music, connecting deeply with nature and spending time with people we can be genuine and authentic with.
Bolstering the belief that our lives are meaningful is easily accomplished by being a good friend, supporting the people we love, even helping a stranger.
It’s worth noting that many common personal growth tools like mindfulness, gratitude and reflective thinking are very helpful in cultivating significance and meaning.
Answer the following reflection questions:
- Do you feel you have a positive impact on others?
- How often do you do something for someone else?
- How do you uplift the people around you?
- In what ways could you incorporate more of that into your daily life?
- When did you last do something nice for a stranger? How did it feel?
- Do you have a sense of significance?
- How often do you spend time in nature?
- Of the people you spend most of your time with, how many are you your true self with?
DO
Meaning isn’t found in one place - we are surrounded by it.
Meaning is in ourselves, our relationships, our work and our life as it unfolds - if only we give ourselves the time and space to unearth it.
Discovering meaning can feel like a really big concept, but practically speaking it’s actually pretty simple.
Here’s the basic steps:
- Create space
- Practice being mindful and present
- Get connected, with yourself and others
- Be patient, but not inactive
- Start your days with intent
- Understand that you create and assign meaning
- Reassign meaning if you feel you need to
- Remember that not all meaning is the big, life purpose kind
Below are a few practical exercises that often help. Try a few this week and see what happens.
- Spend a day or two completely disconnected from the digital world. Then reflect on that experience and how it related to meaning and connectedness.
- Start each day this week with intent. Take two minutes when you wake up to connect with yourself and set your intention for the day. Then get up and go about it.
- Take a look at the everyday things you feel you’d really like to do that you’ve been putting off, like organising a family photo album or taking a bike ride around the lake with your partner.
- Do at least two of them.
- Pets can be a great way to indirectly connect with yourself if that is something you struggle with. Take a half hour and just play with the dog, being totally present to the joy you’ll both find in those moments.
- Sit in nature with nothing to do and no agenda.
- Do something thoughtful for someone you love.
- Do something kind for a stranger.
- Create the space for a half hour of total connection (no distractions) with another human being.
- Play with your kids, without distractions. Children are naturally very connected with themselves and just being in that space with them can be both instructive and joyful.
