Issue 123: Lasting Relationships
THE LEAP
BY QUANTUM ORANGE
GROW, EXPAND & EVOLVE
ISSUE 123 | LASTING RELATIONSHIPS
Each week The (Quantum) Leap summarises a key aspect of success into what you need to Think, Feel and Do to create a personal shift.
The best relationships are the ones where you continue to choose each other, every single day.
~ Carrie Austin
THINK
Lasting relationships are not built on grand gestures - they’re built with consistent small actions, emotional safety and conscious intent. No matter the type - romantic, family, friend - relationships thrive when actively nurtured.
Research from the Gottman Institute shows that couples who stay together long term master what they call ‘bids for connection’. These are small moments when one partner reaches out and the other responds with attention and engagement. It’s not the big problems that erode love over time, it’s the tiny disconnects that go unnoticed in the moment.
It’s important to note that while conflict is inevitable, disconnection is optional. The strongest relationships have rituals for repair, shared meaning and aligned values.
Here are some powerful reflection questions:
- Do you feel emotionally safe and seen in your closest relationship?
- Are you more focused on being understood or understanding others?
- Do you make assumptions or ask clarifying questions?
What beliefs about love and connection might you be unconsciously repeating?
FEEL
Relationships stir deep emotions - security, joy, belonging, fear, even abandonment - which is why they can also trigger our oldest wounds.
To build something that lasts, we must move beyond the illusion of perfect harmony and lean into emotional courage. Vulnerability is a relationship superpower.
If there’s one universal truth in human connection, it’s this: love cannot thrive without honesty and emotional transparency. That includes being willing to say, ‘this hurt me’, ‘I need this’, or ‘I’m afraid’.
The good news is every time you have a courageous conversation, you’re laying another brick in the foundation of a resilient, lasting bond.
Ask yourself:
- Where do I shut down or withdraw in moments of disconnection?
- Do I feel loved only when I’m pleasing or performing?
- Can I express my needs without guilt or fear of rejection?
DO
To have a lasting, open-hearted love affair requires that we stop trying to change our partner and get on with changing ourselves.
~ Paul and Mary Blackburn
Here are some practical steps you can action to create and maintain healthy long term relationships:
Choose Connection Over Being Right
In moments of tension, ask yourself, ‘What does love need right now?’ This shifts the focus off the ego and places the relationship at the centre of your mind.
Create Rituals Of Connection
Consistent rituals build deep intimacy - whether it’s a weekly check-in, a tech-free dinner, or five minutes of sharing your gratitude, make sure you’ve got something in place to nurture your connection.
Own Your Patterns
Instead of blaming, get curious - self-responsibility creates psychological safety. Ask yourself, ‘What does my reaction say about me?’
Communicate Needs Clearly
Don’t expect your partner to read your mind - communicate your needs clearly using invitations, not demands. Use statements like, ‘I feel ...’ or ‘I need ...’.
Embrace Repair
Accept that disconnection will happen, what matters is how you come back together. Genuine apologies, empathy and understanding go a long way.
Celebrate The Ordinary
Don’t underestimate the power of small acts of love - a compliment, a smile, a gentle touch like a hand on the shoulder. The everyday moments are the relationship.
Your relationships grow at the same speed your courage does. This week, take a step toward a deeper connection - initiate a heartfelt conversation, offer a sincere apology or ask, ‘What do you need from me?’
